Difficult, disruptive, defiant: High-performers think and act independently.
Difficult, disruptive, defiant: High-performers think and act independently.
You’re going to have to accept those people ‘work things out’ for themselves
Hi, it’s Clive. This post 12 for my 30 day writing challenge. It’s written for high achieving, ambitious individuals who are exploring elite level performance. Let's exchange what's predictable for what's possible.
This is Harry, my 2-year-old working dog. I nearly didn’t adopt him.
Here’s the story …
I’d lost Chile my beautiful Working Sheepdog and been grieving for almost two years. Vela my other Border Collie was too old to work now. I knew it was time to start looking for a new dog.
I wanted something different this time. I’d always adopted bitches previously and wanted a dog this time. I had criteria too.
Male
Long coated
Large build
You can’t see it in the photo — Harry is just one of those things.
So how did I end up with him?
It all started with a phone call. I’d put out feelers for a puppy. My friend Wendy called to let me know about a litter. She didn’t know the breeder, but told me the pups sounded like ‘the right stuff’.
Now my work with dogs is for fun. I compete in a dog sport called Working Trials. It has nothing to do with sheep. The idea is to test the dog’s ability as a working dog.
It’s a tough test, combining nosework — tracking and searching — obedience, and agility. A canine equivalent of three-day equestrian eventing.
I got in touch with the breeder and had photographs and a video sent. The breeder and her husband were seriously into sheepdog trials (with sheep) and that was the purpose of the litter. That’s not always ideal for what I wanted, because sheepdogs breed for their high-drive to herd sheep aren’t always easy.
Looking at the videos there were a couple of other issues.
The puppies were all short-coated, not one of my criteria. And the father was quite small, which might mean his offspring might be too. Probably not what I wanted.
And yet —
One of the puppies had lots of characteristics that might make him a good Working Trials dog. He sat back from the rest of the litter while they charged around herding each other up (did I say these were sheepdogs). He appeared to be ‘working things out’ before jumping in to the melee.
The breeder’s husband, who also had some Working Trials experience, had earmarked this puppy as having potential — but not for working sheep.
And the weird thing. The puppy had the same, unusual facial marking my bitch Chile had. Now I’m not sure about reincarnation, but this was uncanny. So, I decided to go and take a look the litter.
This is Chile ☝🏻
The rest is history.
Dark Green Harry (his full name) came home with me the same day. He’s proven to be what was predicted. A high-drive dog, yet without manic sheepdogs tendencies.
Harry is happy to be out in the field working for an hour or two, then coming inside and acting like a pet dog. He’s actually one of the friendliest and loving dogs I’ve adopted, greeting everyone with a wagging tail and licks. Working is his favourite thing, and cuddles is next.
Harry's unique blend of independence and drive reminds me of another group I work with closely—high-achievers. With Harry's traits, I can't help but draw parallels.
He’s eager to take leadership — but he’s no pushover. He’ll stand back and ‘work things out’ for himself too. Sometimes that’s difficult for me as a handler, it feels like he’s being defiant, and it’s disruptive when we’re training.
Then I laugh at myself, remembering this:
The meaning of your communication is the response you get.
I was reflecting on my best clients and their attitude toward me as a coach and sparring partner.
And, that response to communication is why I’m posting this here for highly ambitious achievers. They can feel misunderstood and maligned. Often because as high-performers they’re also labelled as difficult, disruptive, defiant.
But, if stakeholders want high-performing talent then they’re going to have to accept those people ‘work things out’ — they’ll think for themselves, independently. If that’s not what the stakeholders want … well better to choose a lap dog and save everyone some grief.
And for the high-drive individuals labelled as difficult, disruptive, and defiant. I’m here for you. Let’s talk about influencing your stakeholders so they respect and appreciate you — difficult, disruptive, defiant.
🚀 Let me ask — what's your biggest challenge handling stakeholders expectations?
I work 1:1 with highly ambitious achievers on their agenda: including mindset and behaviour change, leading others in a high stakes situations, and influencing decisions with integrity. If that’s for you please get in touch.
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Photo by Clive Griffiths